By Gaurav Rastogi
The style, and other reflections
I noted last time that there are some very striking things about the Bhagavad Gita that leap out at the modern reader. The writing style is very mathematical and tight and relatively free of the “Indian mystical” style that seems all the rage these days. Also, there seems to be some solid science (and science fiction) behind the assertions in Chapter 2. Continue reading
In the first 3 years of his life, we were so busy dealing with our son’s eczema and various severe allergies that we really didn’t pay any attention to his personality. Then he started school. School, which is unkind to boys to begin with, has a way of sharply underscoring the qualities that set a child apart from others. Our son was dreamy, distracted and had a tendency to keep to himself. He would look anywhere but at the teacher but be able to answer any questions on the subject being discussed – a parlor trick that caused no end of amazement to the adults interacting with him.
This was over half a dozen years ago, when behavioral disorders were not as much in the cultural mainstream as they are today. Still, we knew he was not like the other kids. I would like to say that we were enlightened enough to know he didn’t need to be tested, but it was most likely the social stigma which kept us from getting him a ‘label’.
Over the course of the years, the 3 guidelines I followed every time I wondered if he really needed external intervention were as follows –
– Could he make eye contact and carry on a conversation?
– Was he coping at school?
– Did he have the ability to make friends and keep them?
So long as the answers to the three questions were in the affirmative, I decided he was ok – different but ok.
Now an excellent article in Newsweek discusses ‘quirky’ kids and how the definition of normal has changed over the years.
More and more, kids who once would have been considered slightly out of step with their peers are emerging with diagnoses of sensory-integration dysfunction, dyspraxia and pervasive developmental disorder, to name a few.
I know this is true from personal experience. If ‘normal’ is a band in the behavior spectrum, that band has been shrinking dramatically. I notice that my son feels less and less out of place as the years go by, not because he has changed in any noticeable way, but that many of the kids around him have behavioral ‘issues’ that once would have just been called personality traits.
The Newsweek article goes on to say –
If we examine ourselves and those around us….we have to admit that everyone is, to a certain extent, odd….So when we worry about our kids’ strange behavior, is it because they deviate from our own expectations of what life should be like for a ‘well adjusted’ 5-, 7-, or 12-year old, or is it because the person in front of us is struggling way more than she should?
I guess the middle road between a behavioral diagnosis from experts and ignoring a potentially serious condition is to make sure your child is capable of coping and navigating his or her world. After that, it is up to us to celebrate your child’s differences.
The postscript to our experiences with our son’s quirkiness is that 6 years after he was born, we had a baby daughter. She is the poster child for ‘normal’. No matter how thin that band of acceptable behavior gets she will always be plumb in the middle of it. She is an uncomplicated child, a joy to have around and a breeze to bring up. And yet, I sometimes catch myself wishing she was a little more imaginative, a little more generous, sensitive and thoughtful – a little more like my quirky, difficult son.
By Rohini Mohan
How long has it been since you wrote a letter in long hand and on a piece of paper?
Funny how we’ve wandered into an era in which we are more comfortable communicating with inanimate objects than we are in talking to live humans. We feel secure only if we are hooked up electronically 24/7. Laptop, Blackberry, and Cell phone, (read as I-phone), are as important for our sustenance as Dal and Roti. Continue reading
Whether it was the presence of the mummyjis and papajis and nanijis or the sheer sentimentality of the songs, this particular episode was a keeper.
When Irfan sang Lukka Chuppi( originally sung by Lata Mangeshkar and A.R. Rahman) he really elevated what till then I had considered a rather pedestrian number. It is a pity they don’t have the concept of singles in India because if ever a song deserves some serious air time, it is this one, in this voice.
Every participant poured their heart out in song and made the sentimental audience, including the judges, dissolve into tears. Thankfully, I was able to fast-forward all the senti bits involving the mummyjis and pappajis feeding their kids on stage, and probably ended up enjoying the show much more than viewers forced to put up with all the corny speeches and the stage-managed pandering which actually diminishes the real emotional impact of the performances.
Predictably, Mirande was voted out. My belief that it will be one of the guys who wins VOI now is on a firmer footing since the gender ratio is now 2:1, though Sumitra has consistently stayed out of trouble in the last few weeks.
I think VOI should bring out today’s performances out on CD( or I-tunes, since the CD seems to be a vanishing specimen here in the US). Worth every penny.
By Vidya Pradhan
A plaintive mass email reached my inbox recently. “I am thila from Malaysia,” went the email(typos intact), “I have always been a movie freak since I was young. Somehow, since the past few years, I kept thinking of writing stories for movies especially Indian movies. In fact, I have written two movie stories and even send it to Revathy madam via e-mail. Unfortunately, there was no reply….I even send my stories to Hrithik's mailing address three years ago but there was no reply. Send it to Vinu Vinod Chopra but no reply too. I am currently working but I know for sure that this Job is not what I want to do for the rest of my life. I would really really appreciate it if you could help me on this matter.” Whether Malaysia or Mongolia, the lure of Bollywood is getting irresistible. Can Silicon Valley be far behind? Continue reading
The appeal of Bollywood can be perplexing to lovers of serious cinema, but there’s no denying the profound influence big studio movies have had on people of my generation. Our formative years were shaped by tales of reuniting brothers, heroic tales of good and evil, and love in the face of parental opposition and social stratification. Our cultural moorings are so steeped in movie lore that when two South Asian strangers meet, all it takes is a filmy reference to break the ice and find a common dialogue.
Given the clichéd, inane and often insane nature of Bollywood movies, one would have though they were ripe for a good satirical look at what makes them tick. The closest Bollywood has come to self-examination is Farah Khan’s Main Hoon Na, which, far from being a satire, is a loving tribute to the magic and inexplicable appeal of these corny melodramas. The movie employs every Bollywood/Hollywood cliché that makes the viewer gasp in disbelief while cramming the popcorn – from Ram and Lakshman the separated brothers, Mission Impossible style action, spit that makes its Matrix-like way to the heroes face, and of course, the climactic explosion. The genius of the movie is in its cheeky self-awareness – ‘Look,’ it says to the viewers, ‘this is what you love, whether it makes sense or not.’
Well, Farah Khan laughed all the way to the bank that time. Her new offering, Om Shanti Om promises to be more of the same, using another time-tested plot device – reincarnation- to explore the evolution of Bollywood from the 1970’s to the present day. The movie has apparently already been sold to Adlabs for a staggering 88 crores, but the real buzz in the movie is coming from Shahrukh’s 6-pack which has already generated the kind of crazy media attention that makes you want to put your head in your hands in despair.
See for yourself. 🙂
Predictably, this has brought out the worst in bloggers, with people commenting on how creepy it looks to have a 44 year old face pasted on a 24 year old bod( ok there’s a little truth to that!) and how SRK is trying to ape Hrithik in the worst possible way. It seems his acting cred, which had risen considerably with Chak de, is taking a real pounding, even with OSO being a couple of months away from its release.
But if you take a closer look at the song( and I have taken many !) you can see it is a complete spoof of the current trend of ripped abs and buffed pecs. And no one can carry off the wink-wink, nod-nod self caricature better than SRK can. When asked if this is the beginning of a ‘shirtless’ trend for him, he replied, ‘No, but I’m willing to go pantless.’ On an interview on Koffee with Karan, he took a good natured swipe at the age-difference between him and his co-star, Deepika Padukone by commenting, “I fully expected her to say, ‘I love you uncle !’” Oh he knows what he’s doing, and so does director Farah Khan.
Expect an energetic, enthusiastic, fun-filled, send-up of the movies when you go to see OSO but for heaven’s sake, leave your brains at the door. It is not supposed to make sense.
By Rohini Mohan
Sunil Lala is a self published NRI author. American Khichdi is a collection of his musings in which he explores the life of the Desi who lives in America. From our obsession for Bollywood to our double standards when it comes to accepting our adopted culture, from the birth of an ABCD to the shock of the death of a loved one in a strange land, from life in India to the Khichdi that life is outside India; the book waxes eloquent on each of these varied topics. Continue reading
Possibly as a result of the evangelist bent of the current administration in the US, there has recently been a rash of atheist manifestos debunking the existence of God and the necessity for religion. There’s Christopher Hitchens’ vitriolic ‘God is not Great’, Richard Dawkins’ ‘The God Delusion’ and a host of other treatises from atheists like Sam Harris and Victor Mills, fed up with the crimes committed by man which appear to have some sort of religious sanction or religious provocation.
To a questioning mind, the existence of God has to be, at the very least, a matter of doubt. As a Hindu, I have been lucky to be part of a religion that is, to put it mildly, rather loosey-goosey. There is room for every intellect, from the slavish, ritualistic devotion to a particular deity to the spiritually evolved Bhagavad Gita and the Upanishads. The framework of Hinduism has perfectly suited my intrinsically skeptical mindset, so I was thrown into confusion when confronted with the need for belief in my 11 year old son.
Like Nachiketa in the Upanishads, my son has lately been obsessed with the after-life – specifically, what happens to us after we die. Being no Yama (except when it comes to homework and bedtime curfews!) I scrambled around for answers that would satisfy without scaring.
In the Upanishads, as in the Gita, the classic answer has been as follows –
The supreme Self is beyond name and form,
Beyond the senses, inexhaustible,
Without beginning, without end, beyond
Time, space, and causality, eternal,
Immutable. Those who realize the Self
Are forever free from the jaws of death.Eknath Easwaran’s translation
Unfortunately, this is a philosophy out of the grasp of most adults, so it was no surprise that it did my son no good. After a few unsatisfactory discussions we moved on to Christianity, where the concepts of heaven and hell have structure and clarity. This was much more to the 11 year-old’s liking and I began to get a glimpse into why religion plays such an important role in people’s lives.
Christianity and Islam both have the advantage over Hinduism of having a set of scriptures that lay down the law in pretty simple lists of do’s and don’ts. My theory of religious evolution goes somewhat like this –
Out of the need for order in societal chaos is born a new religion. To the society at large, it probably takes the shape of a ‘cult’ till it gains enough adherents to become respectable. The three guiding principles of any new religion are –
Contrast – How your religion differs from the existing belief system
Convince – Why it is better, and
Convert – What will happen to you if you don’t join.
Eventually, as the religion ages, it begins to lose some of its dogma and become more inclusive. It also begins to allow conflicting schools of thought to co-exist in relative harmony. But as it loses its fundamentalism, it also loses its appeal to people who want the comfort of being told what to do.
Hinduism is in this mature stage, which explains the rise of gurus and godmen. When I talk to followers of gurus about their motivation, not surprisingly, it is the craving for direction that is the biggest driver. The appeal of the guru is that of a parent for a child – someone who takes on the burden of responsibility of thinking for you.
Newer religions like Islam still have the structure and discipline in place, which is why they are such an attraction to confused, angry child-men seeking a higher purpose in life. A New York Times article about the failed terrorist plot in Germany recently reports –
…radical Muslims began to exert a glamorous gravitational pull on some German youths, German authorities say. In 2003 a local convert calling himself “Hamza” Fischer was killed fighting against Russian troops in Chechnya.
“They like the clear rules,” Mr. Köpfer says of the young converts. “Many of them are attracted to Islam not as a religion but as an ideology.”
I fear the attraction these ideologies have for my pre-teen. I don’t underestimate his need for clear answers. Since I can’t tell him comforting lies, the best I can do is to point out that the inflexibility and exclusivity of existing religions condemn non-believers (that would be us, his parents) to a very descriptive hell, set a good example for moral and ethical behavior, and hope for the best.
By Vidya Pradhan
It is an immigrant’s tale as old as time. Rukhsana( not her real name) was brought to the US from her native South Asian country on a fiancée visa. Once she was married, her in-laws found many excuses not to proceed with her green card application. This ensured that the lonely and helpless girl would submit to other, typical, patterns of abuse – emotional, verbal and physical – without recourse. With her spirit all but extinguished, Rukhsana made a last ditch attempt to escape. While being taken out of the state, she evaded her captors and asked a stranger for help. She was taken to the police station, where she had her first piece of luck since coming to the land of the free, a meeting with a Narika representative. Continue reading
By Rohini Mohan
There are millions of people who set out to do something with their lives. Some fail, and fade into oblivion while most fall to mediocrity; but there are a chosen few who can’t help but succeed. It’s almost like there is a divine force guiding them on their journey. Mother Theresa was one of the blessed ones. And she chose to share her largesse with the City of Joy, bringing succor to many. Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu arrived in India at the age of 18. Clad in her iconic white sari with the blue border, she lived and worked amongst the poorest of the poor, until her death a decade ago this week. Continue reading
Water, No Ice 