In a society where one of the first lessons a youngster learns is to respect and obey the elderly in the family, touch their feet as often as possible or at least when he/she takes leave and returns from a trip, where every young girl moving to her husband’s home is told to take care of the in-laws and treat her husband’s family as her own, the growing phenomenon of retirement centres must come as a bit of a surprise.A lot has happened in the past few decades to make this necessary. Changing cultural perceptions, starting with the increasing assertiveness of the younger couple in how they bring up the kids, to eating out, to managing finances, all contribute to family clashes. The elders no longer set the rules – they are asked to follow those set by the younger generation.The elders’ inability to play a sub-ordinate but visibly useful role in running the family adds to the friction. Significantly, the happiest elderly are those who still own homes, have a regular income and travel at will, those who wisely put money away for old age rather than pin their faith on their kids.
Twenty years ago, when elders began to feel abandoned and helpless, they went to old age homes out of despair. In the face of poverty and cruelty, the twin attacks that often brought on depression, they felt forced to leave their son’s/daughter’s home and seek shelter elsewhere. In every interview residents of free old-age homes narrate similar stories: “I spent all my money on the kids’ education/marriage/business. On my son’s advice, I sold the house and moved in with him. I wrote my will bequeathing my property to my son. My daughter-in-law has no time for me. I’m just a servant in the house.” They left because they had no option. The senior centers then were often low cost, subsidized and poorly managed. Moving to these dreary dumps of discarded parents was a last resort, an act of desperation.
Today, there is a new breed of retirement homes. Financially successful NRI’s have the means to make their parents comfortable, and the need to assuage the guilt in not being there with them. And while the aging parent would like nothing better than living in a joint family, surrounded by children and grandchildren, there is also the realization that living in India, among familiar surroundings and friends may actually be preferable to leading a lonely existence in freezing climates where everyone in the house is busy with their own lives.
Affluent Indians now seek the independence and the responsibility-free comforts of living in post-retirement homes that are specially created to suit their needs. And they seem to like what they get and who they enjoy it with. There are landscaped gardens to stroll in, temples, well stocked
libraries, hygienic kitchens and the company of people of their age who share a common culture and similar tastes. The added attraction is the fact that many of these centers are not too far away from major cities, where the residents have had active work lives.
My mother moved into a retirement home last September. She had been scouting around for one, having decided that her 4 children’s homes in three Indian cities were too restrictive to her taste. We suspect it is because mom is a sprightly 83, having lost none of her abundant zest for life.
Mom discovered Srimathi Sundaravalli Memorial (SSM) Trust Residency during a conversation with Mrs. Jaya Seshan, wife of the former Chief Election Commissioner of India. When she said she and her husband were planning to move into this place, mom was convinced. SSM Residency would meet her exacting standards in food, accommodation and company. She decided to do a recce before casting the final vote.
On her visit, mom grilled owner Mr. Santhanam, manager Mr. Raghavan, the all those in charge of the various facilities. She checked out the main office, the distance one had to cover to reach it and the entertainment center. She even spoke to the gardener. She liked their (practised?) answers. She inspected the cooking area and approved of the modern methods and the gleaming stainless steel equipment. The cook seemed efficient. Mom then had a meal. She liked both the food and the service and decided to give the place a try. A centre that served excellent meals couldn’t be too bad.
The finance works this way: You pay a refundable deposit of a few lakhs and there is a reasonable monthly amount that you pay for food and rent. Anything beyond is extra. Mom chalks up a hefty telephone bill, giving us – and scores of her city friends – her weekly campus news. And remember, she signs up invoices at the Angadi. But her electricity bills and TV cable charges are pretty low. She comes to the city for her bi-monthly medical check-up. What she has now is an AC-ed suite, TV, personal telephones, food that she is used to. Large areas for walks, entertainment minus the hassle of running the apartment/house.
After nearly six months, mom looks good. She has put on weight. In India, this is a sure sign of happiness, if not well-being. She comes to visit occasionally but has become so comfortable with her new home that she returns quickly.
According to HelpAge India, 70 million Indians now fall in the senior citizen category. The number is likely to touch 117 million by 2025. Senior centers run on business lines are booming. Here are some examples.
[1] Ashiana Housing on the Delhi-Gurgaon Road. One/two/three bedroom apartments are priced between Rs 9 and Rs 20 lakh . There are 640 units. The complex offers a 4.5 acre park, a dhaba, a convenient shopping area, doctors on call, maid and driver on demand and bathrooms with grab rails.
2] At Classic Kudumbam, with a built-up area of 50,000 sq ft near Sholinganallur (near Chennai), you make an initial deposit of Rs 10 lakh (this after being screened through a painstaking process), of which Rs 2 lakh is non-refundable. It entitles you to membership in the club with a swimming pool, massage parlour, physiotherapy an hour of internet weekly. Rooms are available on a twin-sharing basis; they are air-conditioned and have a TV set, fridge and a telephone.
An open-air theatre screens films on weekends; the nearest hospital and medical services are 2 km away. Interaction with residents includes moonlit dinners and bhajan sessions. Plans are afoot for dependent living units (where you can live with a dependent), and assistant living units (for the physically infirm).
[3] At Wellness Communes near Chennai single bedroom homes cost Rs 6.75 lakh, double bedroom homes are for Rs 8.75 lakh. There is an additional charge of Rs 1,100 for maintenance and security.
[4] SCR has a cluster of cottages along East Coast Road Chennai. A 200 sq ft unit could cost around Rs 1 lakh.
[5] The Naya Jyoti in Chennai is a 42 unit outfit with an independent kitchen, a community hall and a library. Naya Jyoti’s Noida (near Delhi) Centre offers 24-hour medical help, a bookshop, a bank and a post office among its facilities. Apartments cost between Rs 6.5 and Rs 10 lakh and there is a security and maintenance fee of Rs 3,100.
[6] Amar Nensey’s Bhairavi, built around the Eagleton Golf Course, Bangalore, has a mini recreation club, a hospital and access to the 18-hole Eagleton Golf Course. Apartments cost Rs 12 lakh onwards.
[7] Housed in Basavangudi near Bangalore is a retirement complex owned by H N Reddy, a former member of Bangalore Development Authority. You pay a deposit of Rs 1 lakh, and a Rs 7,000 monthly charge. You can hire a full-time cook, vegetarian meals, and have a doctor on call for your four-bedroom apartment which houses a TV and a PC.
[8] Sharan in Navi Mumbai has an interest-free deposit scheme, most modern amenities from independent living quarters, doctors on call and has a monthly charge of Rs 6,000-10,000.
Water, No Ice 
Hi all, Just came back from spending some time with my mum at SSM, she is very happy there. I had a very comfortable stay and enjoyed the food and also people are very nice. Celebrated very special pongal there and the kanu pudi the day you pray for your brothers and sisters welfare was extraordinarly spl there. Thanks SSM for doing such a wonderful job and looking after our elders and making us less fortunate NRI that can’t spend time with our parents so special and giving us the peace of mind. 😛
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Thanks to all for an exhaustive reporting covering every minute detail. God BLESS.
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Hi everybody who commented about the SSM home. But I am confused as I was unable to log in to the web site of SSM home. Even after July 2009, whwn someone has commented about website not working, what to say about the efficiency of the organizers. Nobody has given the latest tariff for advances to be paid and monthly charges etc. Have to contact them on phone only to elicit such information? Are they afraid of giving any info. on a website which becomes a public knowledge? I am from Bangalore and a senior citizen. I would like to move into a decent senior citizens home in Chennai with my wife, who is also senior citizen. Can Geetha Padmanabhan elicit some information from the management as to the availability and tarif as she seems to be the person whose mother appears to be the most senior among all those residents in the home and has a lot of praise for the home.
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The new website is up and running now
http://www.ssmhome.in/
I tried it this morning and its working and more photos are here as well
http://picasaweb.google.com/vidha16/SSMResidency#
They were just working on their new catalogue that’s all and not afraid of anything. They do not have to be when you have nothing to hide 🙂
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I am sharing our experience on Classic Kudumbam. This is a place in sholinganallur, Chennai. My father was first person who had joined this retirement facility. The place is well constructed. The security and facilities are good. There is a temple in walking distance. They have activities and programs throughout the year. Everyday the cleaning staff meticulously clean the place. There is standby generator and water pumped from underground. There is facilities like doctor on call, broadband internet access. The food is south indian traditional and served promptly on scheduled times. The place is very nice for seniors who needing independent living. I have seen this place come up from the day they laid the foundation stone. Mr Baba Shankar has really worked on the vision he painted to me and my family.
Things to consider is these places are good as long as the seniors are healthy. They helped my father significantly even when he was hospitallized. So plan for this when you are doing the planning.
My recommendation would be also to visit the place number of times on different times of the day. Stay and get a feel for it. Meet with the other folks. Generally these places have to be run at a quality level, so it would be expensive compared to Indian standards. But the key thing is if they are able to deliver than it is worth it.
My father is no more, i still have fond memories of this place. I try to visit this place when i visit chennai to say hello to the folks. I would recommend this place.
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Hi there I posted ssm new website they seem to have removed it. no idea why that might be the case.
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Iam looking senior living home for my mom..living in US makes it difficult to understand senior living system in India. This forum has been real helpful and lots of information about SSM. I had tough time with SSM website, but a phone call to SSM…I was able to get enough information. The picaweb link posted by Ms.Geetha is excellent…I really had good idea what SSM will be…
http://picasaweb.google.com/vidha16/SSMResidency#
Though deposit seems to little higher side, the facilities and security seems to be really good. I did further research, there seems to be good number of retired homes in Coimbatore. I plan visit there also..I also shortlisted lions senior living and need to check there .. I wish good luck for everybody. Keep posting your experience. I plan to get my mom settled in good senior living sometime April 2010 and I will post my experience.
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i hear in ssm ter is raggin of new inmates.in addition inmates ar so starved they snatch t bags of those returnin after an outing in search of food and other items-looks worse tan a kids hostel and gud news fr al of us t bastards sitaramans hv left t place.sattu ozi da devidiya naye(for info on besant nagar sitaraman refer earlier post fm gupta & chitra jayaraman 😯 😯
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Well I am not sure where MS Sumitra is getting all this info from and its not true as I have had so many outings whilst visiting my mum and my food was always there waiting for me in the room, It was always more then enough for me.
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Ms.Sumitra – why so upset & use bad foul language in a public forum? If you are angry and upset about SSM, pl. provide clear details…this will help future inmates. If Sitarams departed then it should be good right? problems gone…what else making you angry? Are you current resident there?
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I agree with Ms Viji. There is no need to use foul language anywhere regardless of the topic being discussed. I guess we are all highly educated and there is no need to behave like this in a public forum and its not lady like either. Who ever this Sitaraman is I do not know neither my mother, My experience was totally different to Ms Sumitra perhaps we are just lucky or may be we just do not take things too personally. Say Om Sai Ram ten times before swearing.
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Ms Viji you should try and visit the centre yourself rather then walking in with preconceived ideas given by others. I believe that is the only way to make good judgements. Each individual is different and especially when considering retirement villages and residency you must make up your mind. Hope it helps and Goodluck with your venture. God Bless.
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I totally agree with you Ms.Geetha. I too think Sumitra is no other than a man in disguise in lady name. I plan to visit SSM April 2010 and make decision for my mom. I have also short listed lions senior paradise and plan to visit there also..my friends mom is living in Vanaprastha Coimbatore and she is in praise about that facility also…I plan to visit there if time permits.
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There are always people 😈 who cannot stand a good thing going like….SSM. Sumitra seems to be one of them. He/she is not worth my time !!!
I speak to my mother often and if anything is not right , she is the first one to call the office and the head trusty (sp?). SSM is like a small well run township and any ‘doings’ wrong and right cannot be hidden for long. People go to places where they are happy and comfortable ; and now more than ever there are many such places to choose from…. imo 🙂
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Agree with you Ms Meena, my mum is the same she is very happy there. I wish there is a forum moderator who can go through and get rid off posts that has inappropriate language here.
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Hi
I was surprised to find out so much information in one place! I have a question on SSM Home, besides the internal medical facilities are there any major hospitals nearby? (By the way, other than the 1st page there is no information on the web site?!)
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Hello Mr Vasudeven there are major hospitals near tambaram. They do transfer patients there if necessary. You need to enter the website and then you have download pages or you can click on ssm residency and get more information about the place. good luck 😛
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Hello friends. My parents (93 and 85 years ) stay at SSM and so do a couple of senior citizen friends. I visit them whenever I can and my view is that SSM is very well run, with a high standard of maintenance, keeping in mind the special needs of senior citizens. Food is clean, of good variety, well prepared and served punctually. Religious sentiments are well respected and traditional occasions are celebrated with due regard to rituals. Courtesy is very evident and response to needs is quick. A very important facility is the Medical Ward, where prompt, good healthcare is delivered. All this is possible only with commitment from Mr. Santhanam and his dedicated team in charge of SSM, as well the others in the day to day operations. My best wishes to all of them.
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Since SSM is a non-profit centre , cutting costs is their top priority. But cost of living being what it is… SSM does charge for anything/ everything that one might need beyond the basics. So keeping that in mind be prepared for any extras. Once a month a meeting is held where any complaints or problems can be aired . And the management really try and take care of it or resolve it….. IMO only time will tell as the place is still quite new and well run for now 8)
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Thank you everybody for your support & information. I have finalised with SSM residency for my mom. Iam totally satisfied with security, food & living. Staff seems to be very courteous and Iam sure my mom will have secured & safe living.
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Hi Viji Glad to know that you have finalised it. It is a big decision and I know the feeling and I can assure you that you will not regret or be disappointed with your decision. My mum is doing really well at SSM 🙂
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does anyone know of any non vegetarian homes for the elderly- i can see that SSM is a pure vegetarian place
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Ms. Geetha… My mom will stay same block as your mom too… My mom is totally satisfied about the place, she just has anxiety about meeting new faces and making friends. She hates gossips, but want to make some good friends…and she is wondering how to find them 🙂 She likes that game room and temple… I asked her to start from there.
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Hi Ms Viji my mum is the same she doesn’t like gossiping she stays away from all that. she loves her library and temple and occasionally the games room. She goes for lots of walk as well. I am sure you mother will enjoy it there. She will be fine. 😛
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Hi Geetha,thanks for informing me of this forum,as I have already decided to join SSM Residency,and had visited ,the place during mid Jan 2010,I totally agree,that the people running the place,are trying to do, their best in providing as much needs to make it comfortable for the seniors to feel at home there.Also this forum has given quite an in site of the on goings,as well as additional,views of the people,living there.So its left to the individual,to make the best of the same,and contribute if they can to better the situation,I think.
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Hi folks,
May be it’s time for me to warn you all of something that’s happened to my mom. 🙂 She has been at SSM for four years now. She obviously loves the food they serve. She has put on considerable weight since she went to live there. We have very mixed feelings about this change in her life. My mom is (or has been so far) an extremely fit 85. She taught us to eat well and sensibly and maintain our figures – long before fitness became a commercial enterprise. All four of us follow those principles of exercise, good food and staying slim and healthy to this day. And mom has thrown them to the SSM winds! What is she thinking? Mom, who has been diabetes/arthritis-free all these years is now, at 85, complaining of pain in the knee! Help!
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Hi Geeta you need to remember its very easy to put on weight when all you need to do is just go to the dining hall and eat. Your mum should try and make it as a habit to walk everyday and be consicious about it. My mother is good at that and I always tell her to go for walks. Otherwise it will be a problem 😦
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Hello Ms.Geeta Padmanabhan, As soon as i saw the facility food and dinning, I too was worried about my mom gaining weight. I have been warning her to eat less, walk more & substitute fruits and veggies instead of rice or fried items. I have to see how it goes after she gets into residency and keep warning about her diet. Your post is very useful, will ask my mom to keep in mind. I advise, now is your turn to take your mom feet and advise her healthy living, but keep in mind…she is also aging and she may be getting issues due to her age also…Good Luck.
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Re: weight gain…. the people do advice that ‘ you are in charge of your stomach’. I tell my mother not to keep snacks in her room and not go to the dining hall if she is not hungry and instead ask them to send coffee or tea to her room , (once in a while. ) that way hopefully no over-eating takes place. She has also put on weight due to her meds and very little activity due to pain her in knees…. Its tough to tell them to reduce their intake….
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Glad to see lot of info sharing here. Any good homes in Madurai area? My parents live there and I am looking for some good home there.
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At 85, my mom is superbly healthy. Doesn’t even wear glasses. If over-eating is a disease, yes, she has it. She walks a lot, is always at the temple at least twice a day. Problem is, she is there when they serve neivedyam, specially at night. She never misses the sweetened milk.
She also finds some kitchen medication the minute she feels the slightest pain or discomfort. She takes an Ayurveda concoction as a general health supplement. She potters around her suite and outside all the time, makes friends easily, pokes into their rooms frequently for gossip. I don’t know when she last had a cold or a fever. Hey, is there a better life? Who will have the heart to tell her to eat less? Why?
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Hello Ms.Geeta Padmanabhan, I sure think my mom will make good friend of your mom in Vaigai block. She got allotment letter for August… though my mom is not very healthy due to her Thyroid issues, but with her heart she is always very enthu person. Your post about neivedyam made me laugh 🙂
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Thanks, Viji. I wish your mom all the best at SSM.
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Does anybody know of any good Senior citizen’s home in and around MUmbai??
Does SSM cater to all kinds of people ( medically). I would appreciate if someone can give me some feedback
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SSM does have low care and high care. Low care people are placed in a different area and high care people are usually in the hospital wing (dhanvanthri)
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Dear Ms.Geetha, What is low care? I just saw Dhanvanthri block only.
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Madam,I would like to know whether you have such a venture anywhere in kerala. It will be kind of you, if u could let me know of any such institutions/centers anywhere in kerala . I am in search for such a center/home for one my relatives who had requested me to find one for them.They don’t have children .Both of them are in search of a place where they both can spent the rest of their life. It will be great if u could help me
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Hi Anoop, please get in touch with Palm Grove, Brindavan. It is in Coimbatore, not far from the Kerala border. People speak very highly of the place. You’ll find the relevant information on the Internet, I guess.
Geeta.
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Ms Viji
Tamiraparani is the low care unit
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Hi Anoop,
You could check out the retirement communities built by Covai Property Centre ( http://www.covaiprop.com/senior_care.html )…
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I am thinking of moving my 85 year old mother from Clasic Kudumbam to SSM Residency’s Tamiraparani Geriatric block. Kudumbam is okay but they have hiked the basic charges to almost Rs. 10K a month for 1 person. With add-ons and nursing aide charges ( Kudumbam takes a cut on all charges) the monthly bill is approx Rs.25K . At SSM’s Tamiraparani block, which provides nursing assistance on call, the monthly bill may be about Rs. 10K less per month but the downside is that my mother will have to take all her meals in her room as it ‘s too far to walk to the dining room. In Clasic she has to walk barely 30 yards to the dining room and she enjoys going there. I am in a quandary. Anyone who has relatives/friends living in SSM’s Tamiraparani block could you please provide some comments/advice? Thanks a lot.
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With regards to old age, there is a significant need of building and supporting more old age homes and cares.
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Hi
Pls let me know if we have such facility in noida .If not then like minded people can join and open one.
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Fantastics to just read the entire post , it kept me interesting.
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Dear all, It was so good to have shared so much info on old age home. Recently I lost my dad and me living abroad was finding it difficult to leave my mother in the hands of live in maid. Also more difficult as she is bed ridden for the last 5 years. we live at Bangalore and was looking something in bangalore or coimbatore. Your info are useful and thanks for that. Will try and visit these next month and would also add some of my comments.
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Hi All,I have been looking for retirement home for my grandparents who are of 83 and 77 years age.Very nice to see all the comments posted in this page.I came across Manolayam http://www.manolayam.com and if anyone have experiance could you please share?Thanks.
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Hi Viji,
Any idea if our moms have met? My mom says she has not been stirring out of her room much for the last few weeks.
Geeta.
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Hi,
Because of the interest this post has continued to generate, Vidya has put it up on the front page of the site. Sigh! A sign of the times!
Geeta.
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Hi Geeta,
My mom seems to know your mom Ms.Hymavathi, she has talked to her… and also she seemed to know Ms.Geetha Natarajan mom Ms.Kalyana Sundari. How is your mom doing? My mom is doing fine, had best time during Kolu season. I wasnt able to get hold of her, all time she was saying something going on temple & kept her busy. She seems to be happy overall, except for few things in food, she says she is not able to get all vegetables like vazahi thandu etc.. that is something may not be possible for mass cooking. She is happy about house keeping service and other services available at door step. I think overall it is good place to live, courteous management, beautiful surroundings…except for minor details at kitchen.
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